That is not something I typically hear when I answer the phone...but today this is what I got. My parents went to Georgia for a week to visit Tara and her family and I was put in charge of guarding and protecting the home front. Apparently I have already failed on my first day. There I was TRYING to enjoy my Sunday nap when doorbell rang. I wasn't about to answer it...I was in full nap mode and it usually just my parents friends. So I continue my nap or at least try because a bit later it rings again...and then again. Was this a dream or am I really getting this pestered? The thought never crossed my mind that I had just slept through a slaughter! Yes..I did and this three attempts of getting me out of my bed was not working. Apparently some mans "bull pit" had just made a fabulous mess of chicken pie in the front yard! I got all the juicy details from my neighbor who has taken it upon her self to call the police about this matter! Yes..the police...because what will this neighborhood come to if we let this kind of behavior continue! We might as just be living in the slums! My question is...what am I supposed to do...press charges against a dog for killing my chickens? I can imagine that court room walls have heard stranger things!
Addendum: So I had some time to ponder the above mentioned killing and I started to think of what other catastrophic events might happen while my parents are away. Will one of the beloved cats die? Will someone break into the house? Will it burn down? I have a very vivid imagination. But not to worry I am sure all will be fine...but it reminds me of a time when there was a death...of a most beloved cat. A cat named Smokey. Smokey had been around for a long time but he died while Jill was on vacation. Now if any of you know Jill, you know that she is very attached to her animals and would not want one to be disposed of in the usual manner. So how do you preserve a cat until the owner can give it a proper burial? Why you stick it in the freezer of course! You put the cat on a sheet cake pan...nicely laid out in a plastic bag so he can be properly cremated when the time is convenient!
Which brings me to another point:
5 Ways to Tell if Your Family Are Hicks!
1. You put a dead cat in the freezer
2. For 2 drivers you own 4 vehicles and all 4 are trucks
3. You have more than 15 guns in your possession
4. You advertise that you have eggs for sale on homemade
wooden sign in your front yard
5. Your parents refer to each other as "Ma" and "Pa"
5. Excitement consists of hunting feral hog
5. One family member has a tattoo memorializing a dead family member
5. You spend more money at garage sales than you do at any store (with the exception of Cabella's or Northern Tool)
5. Your cell phone ringer is of a coyote call
Oh, hell there is more than 5......
1. You put a dead cat in the freezer
2. For 2 drivers you own 4 vehicles and all 4 are trucks
3. You have more than 15 guns in your possession
4. You advertise that you have eggs for sale on homemade
wooden sign in your front yard
5. Your parents refer to each other as "Ma" and "Pa"
5. Excitement consists of hunting feral hog
5. One family member has a tattoo memorializing a dead family member
5. You spend more money at garage sales than you do at any store (with the exception of Cabella's or Northern Tool)
5. Your cell phone ringer is of a coyote call
Oh, hell there is more than 5......
